Adrian Chiles on ITV is like watching with a comedy uncle. But Sky has Jeff Stelling …

Did any other guys out there have the same conversation with the missus? Along the lines of: “I know I said it was the end of the football season, but that was the league and this is the Champions League.” Bet you haven’t even told her about Euro 2012 yet, have you? Yes, I know loads of women are into football, but there are loads who aren’t as well. Including the one glaring murderously at me.

This is it then, UEFA Champions League Final: Bayern Munich v Chelsea (ITV1). ITV means it’s Adrian Chiles in charge at Munich’s Allianz Arena: “a cathedral to football,” he calls it. (Later, commentator Clive Tyldesley describes it as “a spaceship of a stadium”, which is better.)

There’s some time before kick-off – to be filled with the usual rousing montages, a comedic graphic animation of the Abramovich years, the Roberto Di Matteo story, some words on The Drog, interviews with Lamps and Robben etc.

There’s time for Adrian Chiles to be Adrian Chiles, too. He doesn’t like national stereotypes, he says, but the German fans are “terribly organised. They support, they chant, with quite Teutonic efficiency.” He finds a couple of Chelsea supporters, slumped and snoring in their seats after one too many strong continental lagers; that’s John Terry interviewing Fabio Capello for the job of next Chelsea manager; there’s a little feature on ear-flicking. Watching Adrian Chiles is a bit like having a comedy uncle or mate on the sofa with you at home.

He’s got his pundits with him – Gianfranco Zola and Roy Keane, neither of whom really has the English for the job. And Gareth Southgate, who’s just a bit dull. What does Gareth think Chelsea have to do? “They’ve got to perform to their very best …” Yeah, blah, shut up already. Right, the teams are coming out, time for a football match.

It’s an intriguing rather than an eventful first half. Tyldesley has time to tell us that although no Spanish clubs made it to the final, the Spanish weather did. Scorchio, in other words. “One or two Chelsea fans may be coming back a different shade of pink from when they left,” he says. He also says, of Bayern coach Jupp Heynckes, that “his face famously turns red” under pressure. It’s quite refreshing to have a commentator who’s so complexion-aware. Andy Townsend, alongside Clive, says that while Jerome Boateng was at Manchester City, “he didn’t pull up any trees for me”. I doubt Jerome even knew he was supposed to.

There are clearly two main talking points in the first half. Which makes it such a travesty that neither of them is talked about at half-time. Well, you could argue that the lady caught on camera picking her nose wouldn’t expect to be zoomed in on, then beamed to hundreds of millions of people the world over, so it might be unfair to dwell on that. But what about the spider? The giant tarantula on the back of Salomon Kalou’s head, of course. It’s like they’re messing with my head, pretending it’s not there. You saw it, didn’t you?

To be fair, there is a little feature on Abramovich’s squirming that is quite fun. But there’s also Roy saying “listen” a lot and “you’ve got to hit the target”. And Gianfranco saying Chelsea need to be “more cynical in front to goal”. Cynical? Surely he means clinical? No, cynical, he insists. And Gareth boring on about who knows what … shut up, Gareth. If I wanted serious analysis, I’d go to Sky.

Actually I do, so I do – dip in to Live UEFA Champions League Final (Sky Sports 1). Generally better, I think. It has a higher level of punditry from Ruud Gullit, Jamie Redknapp and Graeme Souness, and from the excellent Gary Neville helping Martin Tyler out with the commentary. Plus solid anchoring, with a twinkle, from Jeff Stelling – I’m a big fan of Jeff Stelling.

But maybe you don’t like to line Murdoch’s pockets (you won’t need to for the Euros). I’m a big fan of Adrian Chiles too – because he adds humour to a game. National stereotypes. squirming, drunks, etc. They just need to sort the pundits out. I see Patrick Vieira will be joining them in Poland and Ukraine. What, with Roy Keane? Is that safe?

Anyway, after the break it didn’t really matter whose coverage you were watching, because it all got so extraordinary. Bloo-dy hell. Football’s the greatest drama, isn’t it? And now there isn’t any … well, not for two and a half weeks!

“What’s starting in two and a half weeks?” comes a voice from next door. Nothing dear, the strawberry season, if this weather picks up a bit.

The meeting at Camp David wrapped up on Saturday, but it was not all hard work for the leaders. There was time for birthday cake, and the leaders watched the Bayern Munich v Chelsea final together

• Petr Cech saves former team-mate’s extra-time penalty
• Didier Drogba and Michel Platini console Robben

Arjen Robben was distraught after his latest “terrible” penalty cost Bayern Munich dearly in their Champions League final defeat to Chelsea.

Robben had the chance to put Bayern on their way to European glory in extra time on Saturday night when Didier Drogba fouled Franck Ribéry inside the box.

But Petr Cech saved what was a poor spot-kick from his former Chelsea team-mate before going on to help his side win a dramatic penalty shootout.

Robben, who also fluffed a penalty in Bayern Munich’s Bundesliga title showdown with Borussia Dortmund, said: “I can’t describe how I feel with words, but it’s been a terrible night. Two or three times, you feel you have the cup in your hands but at the end you stand with nothing.

“It wasn’t a good penalty. I wanted to shoot the ball hard and high in the goal, but the ball didn’t go high enough. It was a terrible penalty kick. After that, I still played well but you have to change your mindset at that point.”

Robben was consoled by both the match-winner Drogba and the Uefa president, Michel Platini, after Bayern’s 4-3 shootout defeat, following a 1-1 draw at the Allianz Arena.

“The fact that Drogba and Platini tried to cheer me up was nice, but it’s worth nothing,” Robben said. “I wanted that cup but it didn’t happen.”

In a special end-of-season Sunday spectacular, AC Jimbo buys everyone a pastry and dissects Chelsea’s win of wins.

No one on the panel predicted the final result – except John Ashdown – so expect some soul searching apologies from all.

Joining him on the pod to extol the virtues of Didier Drogba are Amy Lawrence and Barry Glendenning.

But what of Bayern? Raphael Honigstein joins us from Munich to discuss where it all went wrong (and how he ended up sitting in Roman Abramovich’s seat).

Plus Hammers supporter Jacob Steinberg emerges from an alcohol-induced sleep and reveals his fantasy signings for West Ham following their promotion to the Premier League.

Please leave your thoughts on these matches in the comments below. We’ll be back with our daily pod for Euro 2012 in a couple of weeks – as a special treat, we’ll be recording a live show in front of an audience on Monday 28 May.

• Czech goalkeeper was in tears after beating Bayern Munich
• Penalty shootout victory ‘should have happened in Moscow’

Petr Cech claimed Chelsea’s Champions League triumph was a “revolt” against their doubters following his penalty shootout heroics against Bayern Munich.

Cech admitted he was in tears after Chelsea ended their agonising wait for European Cup glory in Saturday night’s dramatic victory at the Allianz Arena.

The thought of Chelsea even reaching the Champions League final looked a laughable prospect three months ago after they lost their last-16 first leg against Napoli 3-1.

But they repeatedly defied the doom-mongers before stunning Bayern 4-3 on penalties after a 1-1 draw at the Germans’ own stadium last night.

“It was a kind of revolt against everybody,” Cech said. “Because everything was going against us and we didn’t have results. André Villas-Boas had to leave, he was sacked, and everybody was saying, ‘You have no chance against Napoli, second leg’.

“Everybody wrote us off against Barcelona, everybody said that Bayern is playing at home, that we have missing players, and we have no chance. So, we kept proving everybody wrong.”

Cech insisted the manner in which Chelsea achieved Champions League glory meant it had to be their destiny.

“It must have been because, all those years, we’ve been really doing well in the league,” said the Czech Republic goalkeeper, who joined the club eight years ago. “And throughout all the years, we were so unlucky in the Champions League.

“This year, everything was going wrong in the Premier League. We finished in sixth place, where we had never finished since I joined the club, and it was the moment where we won the Champions League.

“So many times this season, people wrote us off and we said, ‘OK, everybody keeps writing us off, but we will do it’. Finally. It’s been eight years. The chance came and in a moment when nobody expected it. We grabbed the chance. It’s a dream come true.”

Cech wrote his name forever in Chelsea folklore with three penalty saves in the final, the first from Arjen Robben in extra time and two more in the shootout.

“It was fantastic and when I saved the first one in extra time, obviously it gave me confidence for the shootout,” Cech said, who suffered shootout agony in the final in Moscow four years ago.

“I saw Didier [Drogba] step up for the fifth one and thought, ‘This was the moment that should have happened in Moscow’. When he scored, for the first time in my life I didn’t know what to do. I heard him crying. I was crying, shouting. It was unbelievable.”

Chelsea’s interim manager, Roberto Di Matteo, striker Didier Drogba and team-mates react to Saturday night’s Champions League final win against Bayern Munich

Photographs from the Guardian Eyewitness series

What’s really going through the minds of Cameron, Merkel and Obama as they watch the Chelsea v Bayern Munich penalties?

Watching Chelsea’s triumph in the Champions League final with the other guests at the G8 meeting in Camp David, David Cameron revealed himself to be fervent supporter of west London’s boys in blue. Meanwhile, as Cameron thrusts his fists toward the skies, Angela Merkel slumps in disappointment and José Manuel Barroso tensely grips the leather furniture, new French leader François Hollande looks like he couldn’t care less.

Or perhaps you see it differently. What might have really been going through the G8 leaders minds’ as Didier Drogba converted that decisive penalty?

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